The Glitter Gun Conspiracy
by DarkAngelSnapeLover
Summary: When Kate isn't inside like Jane expects, she goes on a mission to find her young daughter. When she finally catches up to her, will she discover a sinister plot involving DW? One-shot. Completed for a one-shot theme list challenge with TheUltimateCombo. See our profiles for more information.


**The Glitter Gun Conspiracy**

Jane looked around the house frantically. Kate came home two hours ago but was somehow gone now without saying a word to anyone. The six-year-old was a second grader at Lakewood Elementary, and she was one of the brightest kids they'd seen since Alan Powers. She skipped first grade after acquiring a nearly perfect score on a state test. She was prodigy, she was beautiful...and she was missing.

"Hey, Mr. Molina!" Jane called over the fence, waving at Mr. Molina and Alberto grilling in the backyard. "Have either of you seen Kate?"

"She left with DW earlier and didn't look happy about it," Alberto replied. His father gave him a perplexed look as Jane rounded the fence and joined them in the backyard. "DW was dragging Kate that way, a brown envelope in her hand, kind of like how we got our report cards in middle school."

"It was report card day! But why would Kate be with her?" Jane asked.

"I don't know, but she kept protesting. DW wrapped her hand around her wrist and dragged her across the street. I lost sight of them and thought nothing more about it. Is something wrong?" Alberto asked.

"There must be if she's asking," Mr. Molina said. "Jane, how can we help you?"

"Alberto, take me in that direction. I want to get to the bottom of this," Jane said firmly. Alberto nodded, wiping his hands on a towel before following her to the sidewalk. Pal was there with Spike, so Jane and Alberto decided to take them too.

Once they were on the sidewalk, they walked in the same direction Alberto saw them go. After a few blocks, he realized they were heading towards Grebe Middle School, where DW went to school and where Alberto went for a year after moving to Elwood City.

"Have her grades been bad, Mrs. Read?" Alberto asked as the school appeared in the distance.

"I don't know, Alberto. Things have been rough since DW...well," Jane blushed. She didn't want to tell him the exact words about her daughter, especially since he was a boy.

"I understand, Mrs. Read. I have girl cousins," he smiled. Jane nodded softly, gasping as Pal pulled towards the school. "I think they smell something!"

Both dogs dragged them towards the school, causing them to burst through the doors loudly, catching the secretary's attention. When she saw the dogs, she immediately flipped out.

"You can't have dogs here! No, you can't! HEY!" she cried as Pal and Spike dragged them through the halls, up the stairs, and into a block of rooms where math classes took place. In the farthest-most room, DW stood with Kate at her side, a sweating teacher sitting at his desk.

"Oh, thank god, you must be her mother!" he cried. "Please, she's trying to use her sister to make me change her grade. Get her away from me, please."

"NO MOM! STAY AWAY!" DW screamed, pointing something in Jane's direction.

"What are you doing with Arthur's water gun? DW! You're making a huge mistake!" Jane cried, remembering the school zone's zero tolerance policy for weapons or toys of any kind, especially toy weapons.

"No, I'm doing what I have to do. Mary Moo Cow told me that I had to do my best or she wouldn't be my friend anymore. Nadine agreed, and-"

"Nadine? You said you stopped seeing her," Jane cried. "Please, this makes no sense! It's early in the school year. You can make up your grades."

"BUT MARY MOO COW WON'T LET ME HAVE A SPARKLE SUNDAE WITH HER IF I DON'T MAKE GOOD GRADES!" DW bellowed, shaking the walls with her booming voice.

"Alberto, go get help. She's lost it," Jane whispered. Alberto nodded, but before he could leave, DW fired the water gun in his direction.

"EW! What is this?!" he cried.

"Glitter. You'll never get it out, never, ever, EVER!" DW screamed, laughing maniacally. As she did, Kate darted underneath a table and out of range of the glitter. "She was supposed to help me. She's little miss perfect. Mary likes her. Mary likes her too much. I hate Mary! I hate her!" DW shrieked, bursting into tears. "All I ever wanted was to be loved by Mary Moo Cow, but she's turned on me now that I make bad grades. She said I'll never get a unicorn, that I'll never-"

"What's going on in here?!" the principal interupted. Kate darted out the door behind him, a stream of glitter missing her as DW noticed. "What the-? What is the meaning of this?!"

"She's lost it, Sir," Jane cried. "She kidnapped her sister and took her teacher hostage with a glitter gun. She needs help, but I don't want her to be expelled!"

"She obviously has a few mental problems, Mrs. Read. We'll get her the help she needs, but...we're going to need reinforcements."

DW was swiftly taken to Elwood City Mental Health Sanitorium to get better by a special team of people. After two months, she returned home with medication, which seemed to help her calm down. She still failed the first term of math, but the school agreed to help her as long as she continued treatment. DW was a changed girl, but it was her own fault and she deserved every day she had to spend locked in the Sanitorium.

~End

Theme 001: Punishing the Brat

Theme 002: Kidnapped

Challenge: DW Goes Crazy-achieved, though the glitter gun really does work since glitter can't be removed from anything. I like it but not anywhere near me.

A/N: The title is a Big Bang Theory reference: They always have titles like that. This one-shot was completed for a one-shot challenge I'm doing with TheUltimateCombo, but anyone is free to join us. The themes are posted on my profile. I'll also be posting these on my deviantArt account, SS-Chrys. I hope TheUltimateCombo will do the same:)

Thanks for reading, and to anyone who's wondering, no, I don't plan on doing a sequel.


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